Twice this year I have been lucky enough to have had the pleasure and the privilege of playing with Mistress Zoe Harlow. I say “lucky” because after only two sessions, I can say that submission to Her has been special, intense, extremely pleasurable and even transformative.
I have played with many many Dommes over the course of the last 12 years or so. Some incredible, some not so much. In that time, I have experienced many different styles of play, styles of domination, and general approach. I can honestly say that I have never met a Domme quite like Mistress Harlow. She is truly and authentically, one of a kind. I feel like I have finally found what I have been searching for.
One of the things that I love about Mistress Harlow is that She is dominant without feeling the need to be constantly cruel, or mean, or even detached. In fact She is personable, even warm, yet always totally and unquestionably in control. Her dominance is quiet, yet firm. I personally find this to be a much more profound and effective style of dominance as opposed to loud commands dripping with contempt. Her effortless yet strict control only makes me want to submit myself to Her even more.
I find that BDSM and power exchange can be an intensely emotional, cathartic and psychological experience. Too often, I have had sessions where I have gotten the sense that the Domme needs to create an aura of cold detachment in order to be in control. However, for me, all that seems to do is provide a shallow, unsatisfying and even impotent experience.
Sessions with Mistress Harlow have felt deep, connected and intimate. She is a very hands on Domme and employs all manner of touch to exert control from soft caresses to hair pulling and choking. She was constantly in close vicinity to me, whispering taunts and orders in my ear, roughly handling my body in various ways and seducing me with Her wonderful scent. She spanked me barehanded in our second session and though She is petite, She packs quite a powerful hit!
The very first time I sessioned with Her it was in an apartment. Within minutes She had me bound and completely immobilized. However, most of the restraint was achieved with a series of belts or leather straps that ran across my torso, pinning my arms to my sides and binding me to the table I was on. I have long dreadlocks which She also tied up in a manner that rendered my head mostly immobile. Once She had my legs splayed open and bound, I felt quite helpless. Unfortunately since I was so immobile, I can’t do justice in describing exactly how I was bound, but it was unique, and creative, and I instantly knew I was in for quite a ride for the rest of the session; which indeed I truly was. By the end I felt like I had been through an intense emotional and physical experience.
The second time we sessioned in a hotel and the experience was arguably more intense, swinging back and forth wildly from sensual to sadistic play. I can tell She enjoys seeing me suffer, reading my reactions, pushing the physical and emotional buttons that She knows will have an effect upon me. I became very emotional during the second session – in the best most cathartic way.
After both times, I felt that I had experienced sessions like no other that I have had before. There is an almost meditative quality to Her sessions through the atmosphere She creates and Her particular style of domination. Yet at the same time, it can be a quite physical and emotional experience.
I want to also add that part of why I think Mistress Zoe Harlow is such a superior Domme, has been due to my interactions with Her outside of the “play space”. I have found Her to be personable, understanding, patient, reasonable and even generous. Some of these adjectives are not typical to the stereotypical image of a Domme, but for me they are essential. It only makes it more desirable to submit to Her. She has displayed all of these qualities in our interactions while at the same time being the one in absolute control. She is the prime example of how a Domme can be considerate, even nice, yet powerful and dominant.
I also have to mention that when we’ve played, it becomes very clear that She has listened and absorbed the things that I shared with Her during our pre-play communications. I have never been the type of sub who comes with a script or a long list of what I want during a session. I would prefer to have an organic experience based more upon our chemistry and the chemistry of the moment than follow a blueprint. That being said however, I do have my fetishes, predilections and desires. It is very clear when playing that Mistress Harlow considers these things and weaves them in expertly with Her own desires and interests.
The only complaint I have is that I cannot see Her as often as I would like because She lives on the West Coast and I have to wait until She visits NYC :)
I think perhaps the word “paradox”…or maybe more accurately “balance”, is the best way to describe Her. She is sensual yet sadistic; quiet yet powerful; playful yet stern; warm yet dominant. Yin and Yang.
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